We Are Officially Homeless in NC...

It's done. Our home has been 'purchased' by the mortgage company! Apparently, there is some '10 day upset bid' period that happens now for anyone who may have been interested, but was unable to be at the auction. From what I've been told (by the mortgage company's' attorney...) after that 10 day period we will get notice from the Sheriff's Dept. that we have anywhere from 3-10 days to vacate the premises!!!

I had to pick my daughter up early from school today in order to go to the auction. When she got to the office, I noticed that she had red spots all over her face. She has been dealing with a cold the past 2 weeks or so & has had a horrible cough we've been trying to get rid of. Anyway, it became obvious today that what we had been doing is not working so, because we have no medical insurance I had to take her to the ER. We had been there for about 2-3 hours when a nurse came out & handed her a mask & said because of her cough she would need to wear it. We waited a few more hours & she was just soooo uncomfortable & miserable that I decided to bring her home. I knew her pain, when you are just too sick to sit in a hospital waiting to be seen! It's now 1:36 am & I'm debating whether to take her back over or not. Right now she is resting comfortably, she's basically sleeping sitting up! I know that I need help in getting her to feel better, it's not going away on it's own, or with over the counter cough medicine! I'm most concerned about it becoming pneumonia. I think I will let her sleep awhile & when she starts coughing again, I will take her back (it always gets worse in the middle of the night!).

All of this takes me back to a few posts ago, about God not giving you anymore than you can handle - God PLEASE, I'm suffocating here, why do You seem to trust me so much? I NEED a break, a chance to catch my breath. And if it's like I was raised & You are truly punishing me for something, will You Please give me a clue so I can change whatever it is that You are so angry with me for? I'm kind of 'thick' sometimes so You may just need to drop something on my head for me to get it, but You already know that don't You?

There really must be some lesson here, but right now I just can't seem to see it! After having worked EMS, private duty home health care, & hospice for years & dealing with all types of people & their varying issues, I never understood the whole 'hopelessness' feeling until today! Today I finally understand why some choose suicide - I personally don't have the 'guts' to even attempt that, besides with my luck I would just end up screwing that up as well. Just having the feeling of nowhere to turn is so overwhelming. People try to be nice or polite by saying they understand, but unless you've been in this position, you really don't & right now I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone - words just can't describe. All along, I kept thinking, the worse our situation got, the more attention would be brought to the whole 'Role Reversal - Adult Children Caring for Disabled & Elderly Parents' issue. Apparently, I couldn't have been more wrong!!! No one cares, we are insignificant, nobodies! Maybe it's the timing of it all with 'Super Tuesday' & all, we just don't rate - we can't possibly compete with politicians who have campaign mangers & speech writers. Obviously my words aren't as eloquent as 'It's Time For Change' or whatever their mantra is this week - even though a Positive Change is what I'm so desperately needing right now!!!

My daughter is now coughing her head off again & I will once again attempt to get her seen in the ER, I will update our outcome later.

UPDATE: Brianna has pneumonia! After about 8 hours in the ER they did a chest x-ray & told me that she does in fact have pneumonia! They gave us a prescription for Amoxicillin & told me to alternate Tylenol & Ibuprofen every 4 hours.